Here are a few questions that increase our self-awareness.
What happens when you simply notice feelings in your body, thoughts in your mind and simply see, without judgement, what is showing up?
Really, what happens? Is there resistance, pain, discomfort of some kind? Simply notice.
What is your biggest challenge right now?
What part are YOU playing in your game of life? In what ways are YOU complicit in what occurs in your life?
When we slow down and have space to truly look at these questions and learn about ourselves deeply, we can shed ways of being that don’t serve us well, strengthen relationships, and create opportunities to be more loving towards ourselves and others.
This isn't woo woo pie in the sky stuff - I've worked with many high performing, smart, wealthy, driven people who have done the deep work and seen dramatic shifts in the way they relate to themselves, others, as well as experienced work success due to the inner work.
Self awareness is vital to our individual development as well the world's progress.
When we notice and understand what irritates us in others, we might find our shadow side there.
When we commit to up-grading our thinking, we feel better, then we do better.
When we see and understand what drives us, what holds us back, what's possible, we can shift into higher levels of energy, of consciousness, and contribution.
And, literally, all change in the world begins with our own thinking. It doesn't happen out there somewhere.
This includes global issues like gender equality and climate change which are always on my mind. Both of these colossal issues require a degree of hopefulness in order to take action for progress.
As an example, if you feel hopeless about women reaching equal pay to men, you may sit back frustrated and enraged, and leave the powers that be to their agenda.
If you have hope for the above, however, it FEELS better, and you might find a cause or organization to get involved with or start one yourself. Your state of hopefulness will determine not only how you feel, your energy, but what you do.
When we take responsibility ( not blame ) for how we think, feel and act, doors open up to whole new levels possibility.
I'm jumping back and forth here between self-awareness for the sake of your own growth and for the sake of change in the world because SO much is available to us when we start the change from within.
As a therapist and as a coach, I encourage clients to move towards discomfort, not away from it. It's where the learning and growth resides. Don't LIVE there, but do acknowledge and allow some space to process the stuff that triggers you so that you can move on to an amazing present and future.
Then the fun begins - we can start to truly master our mindset and rewire old thinking. It does take doing the reps. The other part of the fun is in the letting go. Much of our stress exists because we resist what is. Resisting doesn't really work well - it pushes feelings elsewhere - like a jack in the box, they pop up unexpectedly or inconveniently. Letting feeling just be works better.
Tools I use to get out of my head, into my heart and deepen my own self-awareness:
Coaching
Therapy
Enneagram
Mentors
Peer support
Space
Breathwork
Singing
Writing
What are yours? You don't need all of these ( don't make your growth another long to-do list!) I don't do all of these at once or with pressure - try things out - and only commit to the work with ease, curiousity and grace for yourself.
Here's to seeing and being with all of yourself.
And to a happy holiday season!
Ellie
And...
Whenever you are ready to take your growth and success to the next level, here are 4 ways to work with me:
1. Unleash your Leadership Style. A four month 1:1/microgroup hybrid for driven women with a track record of success, expanding their leadership and putting the kibash on thinking patterns and habits that disrupt their progress.
NEXT COHORT BEGINS IN JANUARY. EMAIL ME FOR 2023 PROGRAM INFO. and to talk about if this is a fit for you.
** Unleash your Leadership Style for 25-35 year old cohort JANUARY 2023
2. The Enneagram is your personal development map. I'm now offering stand alone sessions. The Enneagram is a profound tool for looking at what motivates you, how you think, act, and feel, and a true guide which offers many specific strategies for growth. 1 spot open in December.
3. 1:1 coaching. Tailored plans for individual needs/goals. 6 - 12 month engagements.
4. Thinking partnership. Do you have a business idea, a project, or an idea? You want to strategize, brainstorm? This is not coaching - it's focused and short term, a space to work out your next big life shift.
Interested in any of the above, email me: coachellielane@gmail.com